10.30.2009

the physchology of baking

I have a confession to make. I've been baking compulsively since I moved to Indiana.

Muffins, Cookies, Breads, Brownies. I didn't know what my problem was. And then Laura said something which made a whole lot of sense.

First you must know that what Laura and I have in common, other than being natives of Campton, NH, is that we've both had a lot of free time on our hands (for vastly different reasons, I should add). But more than enough of it, to the point where free time isn't fun time anymore. It haunts you, in a way. (I know the busy people who happen to read this are shaking their heads in annoyance, thinking Well I wouldn't feel that way... but you'd be surprised).

So, with no knowledge of my baking endeavors, what she said was this:

"Sometimes I just need to bake some brownies, you know? Just to have a set of instructions, and be able to follow them, and you know exactly what you're gonna get."

And there it was.

To be able to control the variables. To know that it's a project that you can actually finish. To feel as if you've fulfilled some sugary purpose.
To be able to look at that huge stack of baked goods at the end of the day, and know that you created it. That you changed something.

It sounds foolish, but it's immensely gratifying when life is otherwise a smorgasbord of starts and stops, scrubbing a dirty old house which never comes clean and job hunting (me), bullshit insurance paperwork and trying to reclaim a normal life (her).

This is the part where I wrap up with some sweeping, uplifting commentary, right? How about a cookie instead?

8 comments:

Ashley said...

i wish you'd been obsessed with baking when we worked together!

Allison said...

hmmm... this might actually explain a lot about my own baking obsession.

But whatever, baking is awesome! Feel free to mail me some of what I'm sure are super tasty cookies anytime ;)

sueper33 said...

I'll take a dozen over-baked c/c cookies, please - I know you know what I would like for Christmas . . .

sueper33 said...

PS I love the simplicity of your insight - thanks to both you and Laura because I can oh so identify, not with the baking though :-)

Dawn Gahan said...

And if you're alone, talk out loud as you bake, and pretend you're the host of some immensely revered Food Channel cooking show. It's better than an hour of therapy.

Love,
Dgirl

Kb_Mal said...

Great post.

I had one of your famous cookies at Laura's this weekend. Mmmm.

PamMattocks said...

It's a form of nesting. New state, new home, new roommate.....bake until it hurts, girl! I did the same thing when we moved from NY to NC and I was job hunting. I cooked/baked up a storm. Love and miss you - Aunt Pam.

julie said...

simply fabulous post. right up there with tom bodett...one of my other faves :). Bake-on!! xoox,
J